Do you want to stop?
If you’re here, there’s a good chance your life has been affected by unwelcome sexual behavior. You may feel as if you’ve tried everything to stop: grand resolutions, filtering software, accountability groups, counseling, prayer, maybe even more extreme measures like fasting, residential intensives, marriage retreats. You may even have had some short-term success. In the long run, though, you find yourself returning to the same websites, engaging in the same patterns of behavior, and hurting the same people in your life over and over.
“Stopping” unfortunately is the wrong place to start. A better question is,
“What will it take to find healing?”
It will take longer than you expect.
How long have you been engaging in the kind of behavior that you want to change? It may take just as long to discover a new way of living. Fortunately, though, most men find freedom in less time.
It will require digging to the root.
Like with any deeply-ingrained sin-pattern, healing begins with exposing the roots. Discovering where the patterns come from is a painful process, but the deeper healing is more effective and lasts.
You can’t do it on your own.
To make the kinds of changes you are hoping to make, you, like every other man who has come before you, will need a supportive community—a community of men who are on the same journey as you.
We help men move from “I want to stop” to “I want to live.”
Desperation often drives men to admit that they can’t figure this out on their own. Facing your fears, admitting that you need help and committing to a new way of life takes great courage. We believe, with the right support and guidance, you are capable of that courage.
If you’re ready to leave your old way of life behind, to quit “stopping” and start living, contact us and we’ll help you begin the journey to true healing and freedom.
Because all things are possible in Christ, change is possible.
FirstLight volunteers and staff
The FirstLight Men’s Community offers
The highest levels of confidentiality
A safe place to be known and accepted
Acceptance of where you are in your journey
The challenge to take the next step, no matter how frightening or overwhelming
A sense of belonging with other men on this journey
A practical, proven approach to healing and holiness
An approach based on Truths of Scripture and the Grace of Christ
Flexibility—a variety of ways to get the help you need
Highly structured check-in meetings help men break shame and isolation, deepen connections with other men, and find mentors or coaches within the community
6 in-person and 15 virtual check-in meetings are offered each week
High commitment level
Clear start and end dates
Led by highly-trained facilitators
Limited group size
Since joining FirstLight I have learned how to understand my emotions, how to process them, and how to find my comfort in God instead of porn. I would not be where I am on my journey of recovery without the men in my group.
Three Stages of Discipleship
Once men are part of the community, we work with them to better understand their sexual acting out patterns, learn strategies for resisting temptation, develop deeper intimacy with others, and to ground their motivations for change on the gospel of grace.
Men who have developed the basic skills for remaining free from unwanted sexual behaviors begin looking at the early emotional wounds that they medicated with sex, reclaim a biblical appreciation for sexuality, and develop skills to help them with emotional resiliency and deeper self-awareness.
Men who have learned to live without recourse to sinful sexual behaviors and who are working on their own personal issues begin to learn how to reconcile relationships damaged by their sins and to how to help men who are not as far along in their healing journey.